How do you measure a woman’s transformative beauty?
All the aspects of her that make her that definitive cutie,
From her hair, her lips, her eyes, her breasts, her thighs
That make so many a man that sees her exhale a sigh
As they see her walking by, she turns and looks and then
The criteria they use would rank her on a scale from one to ten
But there exists a more accurate measurement of feminine heaven
It’s the use of a far more decisive set of criteria – the millihelen.
A unit of one Helen is enough pulchritude to launch a single ship
One thousand millihelens, is the highest measure of one-upmanship.